Sunday, March 20, 2011

Why do I want to put hand-sanitzer in ______?

This is something that happened while at my old job, which reminds me...I forgot to tell you I started a new job which is why I've been silent. Since new job actually requires me to be present, I may be posting less. Wish me luck!

As I was waiting in line for my overly-mayo'd sandwich, I started to zone out. When I zone it looks like I'm staring. In the past, many-o-men have thought I was into them because of this unfortunate trait and now it just pisses my husband off...

Again, as I was standing in the cafeteria line, draped over a high counter, an impulse popped into my head: Put hand sanitizer into your eye.

Wait! What? No! That would really, really hurt. Isn't that like pure alcohol? Ack, I am disgusted by this suggestion.

Yeah, put some hand sanitizer into your eye. Go ahead, take some. It's right there. See it.
I did see it. And I have to tell you, it's not like I actually hear voices - it's that thinking thing you do in your head that doesn't make any noise.

I silently pondered my level of craziness and started looking around for clues. Why, oh why subconscious do you torture me??? And then I saw it: "Iris" brand hand sanitizer.

I thought, "That's not a good name, it's totally suggesting I put that all over my iris. puh. may as well have named it pupil. oh wait, maybe it's after the flower. but no, that's dumb because how appealing is a sanitized flower? they need to rethink they're branding."

These are the kind of wacky associations my brain makes daily. You know what they say about idle synapses...

1 comment:

  1. I am glad I waited to read this, because this turned my sour mood around *snaps fingers* like that. You're weird. I can think of no higher compliment.
    And, to be my pedantic self, I think you're looking for "cornea." "Pupil" is the hole that the cornea covers. :-P

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